An Emotional Tribute

I knew that basing R.J. on my dad was going to be an emotional journey. As I began to write, however, I was not quite prepared for the flood of memories that accompanied the reenactment of my dad's death. I was there again with him in his final days, and the feelings hit me hard. I do think, though, that the exercise was therapeutic for me in many ways. Since Daddy had been robbed of so many more years he should have spent with my family, this fantasy story was a way for me to keep his spirit alive in a unique way. It was also a way for my sons to learn endearing yet true tidbits about my dad, since they were very young when he passed on.

I tried to crawl into my dad's skin and react as he would have, as a spirit trying to work his way through the new otherworldly realm in which he found himself. This experience was draining, and the challenges were many. Everything was much more complex than I had originally intended.

I sobbed through many a writing session as I created R.J.'s story. The first draft included much of my extended family's history as well as my dad's history. I thought it was clever of me to weave such trivia into the piece, especially if my relatives were going to read it.

I later learned that was a very amateur idea. I really had to decide whether I was writing just for my family, or for a more public audience. And as my original little preface began to morph into an actual story, which of those details were relevant to the story and which were simply sentimental memories that needed to be laid aside?

With the preliminary preface finally in hand, I was ready to get back to the life-lesson tales and my original vision.